Dez Reads. Alright, Alright, Alright.

Happy New Year from Team Dez! We’re moving Dez Reads to every other Friday in 2026. I look forward to continuing to curate, read, and learn from what the team is interested in throughout the year.

We tend to gravitate toward stories that interest us personally, but matter to the discipline of persuasion in some way. This week, I lead with new reporting on Matthew McConaughey’s effort to trademark elements of himself, such as the portrayal of his famous dialogue from Dazed and Confused. This is both interesting, and likely an important milestone in the way courts interpret and react to AI deepfakes.

Anne Marie really loves pizza, apparently, which is reflected in her analysis of a sticky trend in which Americans are falling out of love with the pizza pie. The ways we think about nutrition, togetherness, and tradition in the modern world probably all play into this.

Staying on the AI beat, Phil Bogdan shows the power of tech-enabled mischief-making as stray monkeys took over St. Louis (seriously), and Nathaniel Beach has a tribute to the communications and persuasive prowess of Mike Tomlin, somehow now the former coach of the Pittsburgh Steelers.

And finally, Mark Emerson wraps things up with a wild headline. It turns out one of the fastest-growing paths to an American talent visa may now involve subscriber counts, engagement metrics, and an OnlyFans account.

We’re looking forward to another killer year. Thanks, as always, for reading along with us.

Here we go.

What’s a Deepfake?

WSJ. Matthew McConaughey Trademarks Himself to Fight AI Misuse

Alright, alright, alright.

Matthew McConaughey is attempting to trademark the delivery of his famous line from Dazed and Confused, as well as various other personal attributes, such as his stare and smile. It’s an attempt to protect his likeness from exploitation via AI deepfakes.

Ironically, I asked an LLM to assess the strength of these innovative trademark protections in one sentence. Its response:

“He is somewhat likely to succeed in using these trademarks as a deterrent and in clear-cut commercial misuse cases, but success against broader, non-commercial AI fakes is uncertain and will depend heavily on how courts interpret this novel strategy.”

Hats off for the creative approach, which seems likely to gain traction as high profile individuals clamor to protect their most important assets: themselves.

– Josh Culling

When Words Become Culture.

NYT. Inside Mike Tomlin’s emotional final meeting as Steelers head coach

In Pittsburgh, we have our own language: “Pittsburghese”. We say “Yinz” instead of “you all”, “chipped ham” instead of “lunch meat”, “jagoff” instead of “jerk”, “nebby” instead of “nosy”, etc. While it may sound like nonsense to outsiders, this unique adopted language is important to those raised by the city.

Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin exemplified the use of language with his infamous “Tomlinisms” – memorable quotes that became almost as famous as the coach himself. With Coach T’s resignation this week, I’m taking off my fan hat that saw Tomlin bring home a Super Bowl, and I’m putting on my comms hat in appreciation of Coach T’s unique ability to communicate with the media, players, and fans.

In honor of Coach Mike Tomlin’s 19 years at the helm of the Steelers, here are my favorite Tomlinisms:

1. “I can’t give you all the ingredients to the hot dog, you might not like it.”

2. “Don’t blink. If you’re a blinker, cut your eyelids off.”

3. “We need volunteers, not hostages.”

4. “If you got red paint, you paint the barn red.”

5. “There’s a fine line between drinking wine and stomping grapes.”

6. “We’re still squirreling those nuts.”

7. “The Standard is the Standard.”

– Nathaniel Beach

Crowdsourced Chaos.

AP News. Monkeys are on the loose in St. Louis and AI is complicating efforts to capture them

We hear a lot of horror stories about how artificial intelligence can be used against society, such as mass government surveillance through facial recognition. Well, here’s a positive – and slightly rebellious – use case of AI that can throw a monkey wrench into your “friendly” local government’s AI surveillance program – if there ever is one.

A small gang of Vervet monkeys somehow escaped their anonymous owner’s home and went on the loose in St. Louis, Missouri. It sent authorities scrambling like keystone cops, thanks in part to AI. Soon, “concerned” citizens throughout the area began posting AI-generated images of Vervet monkeys in different locations all over St. Louis, confusing authorities and allowing these innocent monkeys to elude capture.

It’s like a new take on that classic scene from the movie Spartacus, where this leader of a band of renegade slaves was given a chance to save his comrades from the Roman legion by identifying himself among the crowd. As he began to stand, hundreds of fellow slaves stood up in his stead, shouting “I am Spartacus.” Spoiler alert: Things did not turn out well for Spartacus, and sooner or later, these monkeys will probably be captured through ground truthing, but St. Louis residents really found an interesting way to counter the misuse of technology.

– Phil Bogdan

Nostalgia Served by the Slice.

WSJ. America is Falling Out of Love With Pizza

This is my love letter to and in defense of pizza. Pizza is the perfect food, with nearly endless combinations of ingredients and styles. While I have my favorites among the options, I’ve never met a pizza I didn’t like, unless it had pineapple on it. Apparently, I’m in the minority, and Americans are over this tasty treat.

According to the Wall Street Journal, peak pizza consumption is a thing of the past. Instead, dining at fast casual Mexican food eateries and coffee shops are on the rise. This news is both surprising and saddening to me.

There is a nostalgia and camaraderie with pizza that doesn’t exist with other foods. Pizza Fridays has been bringing my family and friends together for decades. It’s THE original – and for so long was THE only – delivery option. It’s also the centerpiece of pizza parties and pizza day at school. Last but not least, pizza, personal pans specifically, were the foundation of the greatest reading program ever — Book It.

Big Pizza is concerned after a number of once-popular pizza chains filed for bankruptcy last year, and frankly I am too. I have to believe the crusade against carbs is at least partially to blame.

Whether you like your pizza cut in squares or triangles, with white or red sauce, thick or thin crust… there are so many reasons to love it. In a world that’s unpredictable and ever chaotic, “there are certain things you can depend on in life, and death; taxes and pizza are among them.”

Here’s to eating more pizza in 2026.

– Anne Marie Malecha

Talent Redefined.

Independent. US is granting way more visas to OnlyFans creators under ‘talent’ provisions typically used for celebrities

In a world where you never quite know what headline is coming next, this one stopped me cold. You want a fast track to getting your visa? Start an OnlyFans.

According to the Independent, US immigration officials are increasingly approving O-1 visas for social media influencers and adult creators with large online followings. These visas were originally designed for people with extraordinary abilities in fields like arts, entertainment, or athletics. Today, immigration lawyers say digital popularity, subscriber counts, and online earnings are becoming key evidence of that extraordinary status.

In practice, that means creators who can prove sustained attention and commercial success online are being fast-tracked through a system that once catered almost exclusively to elite performers and cultural figures. Influence is now measurable, documentable, and apparently visa-worthy.

In this age, not much surprises me anymore. What a time to be alive.

– Mark Emerson